Life Once Again Life Once Again
After opening the door and entering the café, Maru greeted the owner who welcomed him warmly. The owner told him that she wished they’d do the shoot for longer because she had more customers now.
“I’ll put your coffee on the house. It’s a secret from the others.”
“Can’t you give some to the other people doing the shoot?”
“I’d love to, but if I give a free cup to everyone, I’d have a glaring hole in my accounting book.”
The owner made a dejected expression before smirking.
“Or what, should I do it? I’m actually known to be a big spender around here.”
“I was kidding, you know that. I’ll be here to buy 40 cups of black coffee around 3. I’ll bring it out in a large container like last time, so please be prepared for it.”
“I have it in the fridge already. I used some good coffee beans for it, so I’m sure it’ll taste good.”
“Thanks every time.”
“Don’t thank me. I’m getting paid for it. I’m grateful that you’re buying.”
But still, try out a latte from time to time: the owner added.
“Since you mentioned it, I should get a latte this time.”
“Isn’t your manager here today?”
“He had some work to do. But you asked me that last time too. Are you perhaps interested?”
“I wouldn’t go as far as to say interested, but how old is he this year?”
“From what I remember, Yeonjin-hyung is 30 this year?”
“Oh, my. He’s two years younger than me.”
“Two years? That’s perfect.”
The owner made a mysterious smile and went to prepare the coffee. Meanwhile, Maru crossed his arms and looked at the woman sitting by the glass wall.
He was sure of it now that he had gotten closer. That person was looking outside nervously before looking at her phone and then outside again repeatedly.
“Mr. Maru. Here. I put extra syrup.”
“Thank you.”
Maru turned around with the cup. As a consequence of quitting smoking, he became addicted to coffee. Well, maybe it was better than cigarettes which were all harm and no good.
As he sipped on the latte, he walked over to the window seat. The woman didn’t even notice him approaching because she was looking outside.
He cautiously scrutinized the side of the woman’s face. Now, there was no more room for doubt. It was definitely Ahn Joohyun.
“Hello, senior,” Maru said in a low voice.
Joohyun, who was looking outside, flinched and turned her head around.
“Pleased to meet you. I’m Han Maru.”
“Uh, okay. Yeah.”
Joohyun lifted her sunglasses. Her lips were twitching, and her eyes were moving left and right. How did he notice?: her eyes seemed to say.
“If I was bothering you, I’ll leave quietly. I won’t tell Bangjoo about it either.”
“Wait.” Joohyun quickly turned around.
He wondered what she was doing and looked outside. Bangjoo, who was next to the lighting director, was staring intently towards the café. Making eye contact with him, Maru waved his hand. Bangjoo tilted his head and looked at him before turning around.
“Bangjoo went elsewhere now. You can turn around.”
“Really? You’re sure, right?”
“I wouldn’t lie to you, senior.”
Joohyun coughed faintly before cautiously looking outside the window. Only after she saw that Bangjoo was no longer in sight did she sigh in relief.
“Sheesh, his intuition is too good.”
Joohyun stood up from her seat. She walked to the entrance of the café with the plastic cup that had about half of the coffee left.
“Aren’t you following me?” Joohyun said as she opened the door about halfway.
Maru followed Joohyun after saying goodbye to the owner of the café. Joohyun took off her sunglasses after walking to the back of the building.
“How did you recognize me?”
“Is there a man around my age who doesn’t?”
“That’s true, but look at me now. It wouldn’t be strange if people didn’t recognize me since I put on a lot of weight. No one recognized me on my way here either.”
“I was also rather perplexed at first, but I could tell from up close. Your facial shape, the neckline, and especially your eyes.”
“Hey, you have a knack for pleasing people, huh?”
“I’d love to score points with you.”
Joohyun smiled. Whether she found him cocky or cute, he couldn’t tell, but it wasn’t indifference, so that was good.
“You’re more peculiar than what I heard from Bangjoo.”
“Did he talk about me?”
“He did. Apparently, you told him you don’t need to meet up with me and that he should just do well with his acting.”
Maru nodded and confirmed her statement.
“No matter how old I am, isn’t it excessive to say that it’s not necessary for you to meet me?”
“Well, I can just ask others for that. We might meet each other if we keep working too. Above all, right now, there’s no benefit for me to meet you. On the other hand, Bangjoo is a very useful junior. Having him do acting for me is a lot more beneficial.”
“That hurts my pride. I’ll take back what I said about how you’re good at pleasing others.”
Despite this being their first meeting, Joohyun was talking to Maru without any formalities. Maru didn’t dislike that.
“But were you planning to stay hiding?”
“Would I have been there if I was going to say hello? Even though he’s my brother, he almost freaks out when I try to talk to him in public. I have no choice.”
“That’s unexpected.”
“What’s unexpected?”
“You’re a lot different than how you are on TV. I thought you’d go say hello to him without minding the others.”
“You know how TV works, and yet you believe that TV personalities are real? I mean, sure, that is?how I usually act, but I can’t do the same with Bangjoo.”
“Sounds like something happened.”
“Are you curious? Do you want me to tell you?”
“Are you okay with telling someone you’re meeting for the first time something so sensitive? I wouldn’t do it if I were you.”
.
Joohyun tilted her head crookedly and spoke,
“It’s okay. It was Bangjoo who said that Han Maru is a good person. A person who’s good to my brother is a good person to me. I usually distrust others, but someone Bangjoo trusts, I trust.”
“Being a good person isn’t the same as being trustworthy. I might have put on a pretense in front of Bangjoo.”
“Then, I guess I can’t help it. If I end up receiving harm because of it, then that too, is just inevitable. Actually, something like that is trivial. For me, it’s a bigger problem that I can’t trust someone that my brother trusts.”
“You seem to cherish him a lot.”
Joohyun raised her chin a little. Her eyes were looking at the sky.
“I do. I can’t help but cherish him. He suffered so much because of a bad sister like me, so how can I not? I feel sorry, guilty, and regretful… combined, that’s the meaning that Bangjoo holds for me. Though, more than those emotions, I love and cherish him more.”
A sad smile flashed across Joohyun’s face before disappearing.
“Is he doing well?”
“He is. Both in acting and other work. The person sitting next to Bangjoo is the lighting director, and he treats Bangjoo like his own brother. He’s trying to poach him every day to come to his lighting team.”
“He’s smart so he can do anything.”
“That’s a generous evaluation from you.”
“Why, you don’t like it?”
Maru smiled and shook his head.
“Try calling Bangjoo. You came all the way here, so you should see his face at least.”
“He’ll tell me to stay away, you know? He’s someone who tells me that he can take care of himself and that I should stay out of it. Also, I don’t want to see him separately on set either. I won’t be able to help him at all. Bangjoo has been hurt a lot ever since he was young because of me. There were too many people who tried to reach out to me through that young child. He went to the emergency room once because of some crazy bitch too.”
It still makes my stomach churn to this day: Joohyun added as she stroked down her hair. The tips of her eyes were raised as if to indicate her anger.
“Anyway, too many things happened.”
“None of them are your fault.”
“Right, it’s those bastards that are at fault. But ultimately, I gave them the cause,” she said as she looked at the ground.
“I can see why Bangjoo tells you not to come to the set.”
“What do you mean?”
“There’s no one who likes being treated like a child. As you said, Bangjoo is a smart fellow. He’s neither so pathetic nor so immature to hate his sister unconditionally without thinking about what caused those incidents. But you keep treating him like a kid. Even I would rather not see someone like that at work.”
“When have I treated him like a kid?”
“Everything you said to me indicates that. Did Bangjoo ever say that he resents you with his own mouth?”
“I can tell even without having him tell me that.”
“Looks like you can read other people’s minds. I can’t do that. I can’t read what a snot-nosed brat is thinking, much less a fully-grown adult. Don’t you think it’s impossible unless you hear that from the person himself?”
He looked at Joohyun who seemed to be in thought and added, “Aren’t you afraid that Bangjoo might blame you?”
Joohyun crossed her arms after listening to his words. Her expression slowly turned into one of indifference.
“After saying that you can’t read what a fully-grown adult is thinking, you’re actually pretty good at it.”
“Well, I have seen and heard a lot of things you see. You can’t exactly ignore a massive amount of data.”
“It might be as you say. I might be afraid. That’s why I always try to sound cheerful whenever I call him. I’d tell him a lot of things. Do you want to go out together? Do you want to eat out with me? Do you want me to buy you something?: I don’t really talk about what’s deep inside.”
Joohyun put on his sunglasses again. Her eyes, which told a lot of things, were covered up.
“As you say, I might be treating him like a child because I’m afraid. It pains my heart to imagine him telling me words of clear resentment in adult language. I might become sick just from that.”
Joohyun, who was speaking slowly, put on a faint smile.
“I really said all sorts of things to someone I’m seeing for the first time. Forget what we said here, will you? It’s nothing interesting. It looks like things will get more uncomfortable with me staying here. Good luck with the shoot, and please take care of Ba… actually no. He’ll do fine by himself so use him as you wish.”
“Senior.” He stopped Joohyun from turning around. “Would you like to call him?”
“Call Bangjoo?”
“I know that feeling. The volume of that fear becomes so big and eventually becomes difficult to even look at. That’s why you turn your head away from it and forget about it, thinking about someone saying that time is the medicine. Then you realize, fear does not subside and time can never be a medicine.”
He looked for Bangjoo’s number in his contacts list.
“Try talking to him. Be it resentment or whatever, try listening to what he has to say. This is just my prediction, but it might actually be resolved ridiculously easily. Fear usually stems from not knowing. The moment you look at it directly, the massive volume that looked like it was about to engulf you becomes smaller than a fingernail. So small that you can blow it away.”
Maru asked if he should call him with his finger right above the call button. Joohyun watched for a while before taking off her sunglasses.
“Look at me, losing my composure in front of a junior. I’m so uncool.”
“Running away at this point would be even more uncool.”
Joohyun received the phone.
“But hey, were you always this mindful of others’ businesses?”
“No. I don’t trust people. I calculate my benefits and losses too. But I put away the calculator for people I think are important. I graduated from that a long time ago.”
“What if Bangjoo still resents me?” Joohyun said without hiding her unease.
“What else? Scold him for not being able to discern what’s right and wrong despite being an adult.”
“Hey, now that I look at you, you’re pretty nasty.”
“I learned this from you.”
“From me?”
Joohyun, who scanned him up and down in puzzlement, calmed down her breathing and raised the phone.
She tapped on the phone and put it against her ear. A moment later, she started speaking,
“It’s not your senior, but your sister. Why am I using this number? I’ll explain in just a moment. But first… there’s something I want to, no, I have to talk about with you.”